My life on line :-III- Laugh and cry. 40th Anniversary of John Lennon's death.(08/12/20)

On His Own Write        by            John Lennon (1964)

P 57

"Puffing and globbering they drugged theyselves rampling

or dancing with wild abdomen, stubbing in wild postumes amongst themselves  "

He was like James Joyce: creating new words on old ones and letting us wonder imagine dream... 

With his sketchings this book is amazing, and it is on line. (perhaps not for long? at the moment it is, it can be shared,  it is an amzing treasure! )

 

 On this precise day,  forty years ago he was shot by a lunatic because he imagined 'no heaven' above us...

Today I do do not want to read the news!  I feel like shouting :

'Father you left me..'  like John did .

 How many people round the world  could join me in that cry? "99/100 of parents in the world alive or half dead...

" says John Lennon  in 1972 at the opening of "Mother" (live concert)

 It is fine now with me because I said 'good-bye ' to him on his last phone call in 1995.

After having ignored my existence for nearly fifty years I could tell him  on the phone that he did not  bring me  up, therefore I had no feelings to share with him, while my Mother he left in the fifties, was now  at  her last battle: she could no longer fight the horrible pancreatic cancer that was eating her away. My stepfather whom I cared for until he passed away was more to me than' a father'  and then  what is a 'real father'? I never had one but had this marvellous person who made my Mother smile again and was so close to me and my husband too as he spent the end of his life with us. When I was a child this person who came in my Mother's life gave me confidence, always quiet and caring, never scolding me, leaving my Mother deal with me,  but always encouraging me to be peaceful and understanding with my mother( and myself too).